Mood Changes with the Weather

Well, I woke this morning to the odd sound of a thunderstorm approaching from the southwest. I can't remember ever hearing thunder in February before, except perhaps when I was living in Texas. I had planned on doing a little writing about positive thinking, but thinking but the thunder and reading the news pulled my thoughts toward the weird weather, climate change, the chemical spill in West Virginia and the coal ash spill in North Carolina. My mood was drastically sinking and I found myself being downright angry by the time I was done browsing the headlines.

Now aside from being great for future rants, this sort of emotion is not really beneficial for someone wanting to get other things done during the day and maintain a positive outlook on things. I got out of bed, paced around the house, and concentrated on taking slow deep breaths. This helped a little but it wasn't until I decided to weigh myself that things really got working.

I had not weighed myself since February 8th, when I was 216.6 but was not expecting too much change. I have been diligent in my mostly daily exercise and have continued with my basic diet plan of no wheat products (aside from some General Tso's Chicken and one wheat flour taco shell). I have added a few more exercises into my regimen, including shoulder and arm weight training, and added a few more yoga stances and stretches.

But I was not expecting this...

Well! My mood improved immediately (although looking at my toes makes me rather self-conscious, maybe it's the camera lens). The other things on my mind will have to wait for another day as I am feeling too good about myself at the moment. Plus, I have now used up my allotted blog time and have to finish repainting this room.

Hope you all have as pleasant a day.

Excitement of Olympic Proportions

I have been listening to Pandora radio as I type or clean house for a few months now. I generally listen to a lot of movie soundtracks that naturally include a lot of music composed by John Williams (StarWars, Indiana Jones, Superman, etc.) which, as I have mentioned before, is exciting and inspiring. Incidentally, listening to the theme from Raiders of the Lost Ark, as you drive anywhere makes the trip awesome. Anyway, point being, John Williams also composed Summon the Heroes, one of the title tracks to the Olympic Games and it always comes up during the course of a day's listening. This reminder of the upcoming Games got me excited and coupled with the frequent bouts of snow made me want to run out and buy skis. Fortunately that madness would pass but I still looked forward to the Winter Games and now they are here.

I did not watch any professional sports growing up aside from the Superbowl at the Meeks' house, down the hill. I spent more time running around myself than watching sports on TV and I only played Little League for two years as I didn't really enjoy the heated rivalry that it all seemed to be about. I played soccer and basketball in high school but again, this was more to just be part of a team rather than a passionate attachment to the sports. Likewise, I have never followed a team of any of the mainstream professional sports, nor cared who won or lost. The Olympics, on the other hand, always managed to get my attention. Both summer and winter I would watch and while routing for the US, I loved the stories of all the athletes and could easily be compelled by a good one. Who didn't pull for the Jamaican bobsled team?

However, I have always had a certain fondness for the Winter Olympics that started back during the the ones at Lake Placid, NY back in 1980. I remember being awed by the luge, bobsled and the downhill. I enjoyed the artistry of the figure skating and the good old fashion excitement of the speed skating and cross country skiing races. And then there was that hockey game with the Soviets. While I didn't understand the political and nationalistic overtones, I did know an exciting game when I saw it and remember being swept up in the fervor.

This may have been partly due to growing up in NY where we had awesome winters and a great sledding path from our house down the Meeks'. When the road was snow-covered we would walk to the top of the hill and fly down the 3/4 mile slope, day or night while hoping the snowplow wouldn't show. There were days growing up that the whole neighborhood would be out on the road. We would make run after run, head in for PP&J and hot cocoa, giving our soaked gloves just enough time to heat by the wood burning stove, before heading back out for another few hours. I am not just  speaking of my childhood here, we did this three years ago (the last time I was home in Garrison and there was snow on the ground). Dad used to take us skiing a lot, as well,which I always enjoyed, despite generally going home with a good bruise on either butt cheek.

Watching the games during the last few days (and every time I watch them) I am nostalgically transported back to the games at Lake Placid. I get caught up in the excitement and cheer for the US when one of our athletes win a medal. I watch the award ceremonies and am moved by the emotion and symbolism of the National Anthem  and the raising of the flag. But, as mentioned, I do not hold out for the US alone. Jessica and I routed for the 41 year old ski jumper from Japan the other night, based on age alone. I am inspired in my weight loss and exercise by watching athletes how have been driven and inspired by those who came before them.

There is something about the Olympics that transcends professional sports. It isn't about money, although winning a gold medal pretty much guarantees one some great endorsements. It's about putting yourself out there, holding nothing back and throwing caution to the wind (which is often in your face at multiple miles an hour). It's about fair play and sportsmanship. Just this morning I was inspired, not by an athlete but by the Canadian cross country skiing coach who, after witnessing a ski break, jumped the fence and brought a new ski to one of the Russian skiers so he could finish the race. That is what sport should be. That is the embodiment of the Olympics for me.

One Month Down, Five Decades To Go

Well, it's been a month and I am doing great. I am now down 16 (point something) pounds to 216.6 and the changes are noticeable. I started the new year at a tight size 38 waistline and today, while walking through Walmart, I had to keep pulling them up for fear of walking out of them. If that doesn't make one happy, although situationally frustrated, nothing will.

Watching Headline News in the mornings, they are doing a recurring segment entitled New Year's Resolution Reboot. They have experts one can contact online for advice on fitness, diet, finances and relationship advise in an effort to pull people through the one month slump (or surrender) that occurs each February. While thinking this was both a nice service and a crafty way to keep the viewing public watching, I was even happier by the fact that I didn't need it. Well, most of it anyway.

FYI: If you want a nice sized tax return make sure you don't put in too many exemptions on your W4. Where my income increased due to  a full year of work I had a bit of a surprise. The tax return is a funny thing to look forward as we are basically letting Uncle Sam make money off of us throughout the year. Not having as much taken out of my paycheck meant I had more money through the year but there is something very satisfying about receiving that check every February. Especially if you are expecting it. Lesson learned.

My exercise repetitions continue to increase. I can now do 20 push-ups, three pull-ups and we are up to 13 of the Tibetans. For my Army friends: you are probably thinking, "20 push-ups?" Yes, but I am doing them in a four second movement (2 down and 2 up). I have not given myself an Army style PT test for fear of pulling something. As for the pull-ups, I was able to do seven of them when I left the Army. It is amazing how much easier they get when you drop extra weight.

I have made several interesting discoveries diet wise as well. Chocolate is a wonderful treat food and has no effect ( or at least not much) on my weight loss. One Cadbury  Milk Chocolate bars week is good stuff and makes things feel significantly less Spartan. I'm still enjoying my salads and and not missing pasta or bread. This still amazes me. While food shopping yesterday it didn't occur to me to get any of my old eats so I guess the attitude adjustment is still running strong.

Sitting here typing, I am consciously aware of the fact that my belly is smaller. My upper abs are flat and while I can't yet "pinch and inch" I can still "grab a slab," although it's a greatly reduced slab. My biceps have increased in size and definition as have my chest muscles and calves. Flexibility is making major advances as well. A month ago I could barely reach behind my back and interlace my fingers with my arms straight but today I can so with  ease at at a 45 degree angle to my torso. My legs are more limber and I can easily touch my toes without warming up. My split is widening daily and I can actually do some impressive kicks again (Karate type, that is).

Okay, okay, enough self promotion for one day.


Thanks, HLN, but no reboot needed here.

Adjustment to Attitude Adjustment, part One

Rereading that post this evening I was struck by something, two things actually. One was that it made me sound like I am massively depressed and unhappy with my life. Not correct. I was tying to make some personal and broad based observations at the same time and when taken together made me sound pretty low. Two, as I was reading the post out loud to my wife, she was struck by the same thing and it scared the crap out of her.

Note to self:    Have Jessica proof read posts for sanity content before pushing "publish."

I have gone back and made a few adjustments to that post, clearing up a timeline issue and correcting for overly depressing content. Being 30-40 pounds overweight is very stressful and does not cause joy. I was definitely unhappy in this regard. I didn't like to see myself without a shirt on, my knees were extra sore and it was getting hard to bend over and tie my shoes without holding my breath.

The point I was trying to make was that life can be stressful at times, there is no guarantee that we will spend every day smiling ear to ear and floating two feet off the ground. That does not mean, on the days that isn't happening, that life sucks. On the contrary, there are always things that are uplifting and bring joy. Just seeing my wife every morning and evening makes whatever I do in between worth the wait. Her smile and hug when I walk through the door is a precious gem I would trade for no amount of money.  My daughters (when I am not chasing them down to finish their homework) are a joy and full of curiosity and enthusiasm for life. Our numerous dogs and cats share unconditional love as well. And I have a job that leaves me with no doubt at the end of each day, that I made a difference in the lives of others.


Right then! Moving on!

Attitude Adjustment, part Two: Redefining My Feel-Goods

Many people don't know the difference between fed well and well fed.

                                                          

                                                                                                 Poster at Doctor's Office

The above quote was at doctors office at Cabell Huntington Hospital and it really made an impression on me when I saw it. The more I talked to people in my job as a nurse it made an even bigger impression, because it was so true. I have overheard conversations of people discussing nutrition that went a lot like this:

A:  "We were fed all kinds of crap growing up"
B:  "No you weren't! You always had a full table of food."
A:  "Yes, but none of it was good food."
B:   "That's not true. It was all good food. You never went hungry"

Like so many things that cause a ruckus in our society, this a fundamental misunderstanding with language.  Much like freedom of speech doesn't mean that others won't shout you down (using their freedom of speech) when you say something offensive.

Food is awesome and I love most of it, carrot sticks to carrot cake (hold the liver, thanks). Not only do we enjoy the flavor but it causes our brain to react in amazing ways, producing endorphins that make us feel even better. Like other drugs, these endorphin releasing foods can be beneficial, even fun in small amounts but when it becomes your daily go to feel good, they become a habit, lading to an addiction. For anyone who has ever quite smoking, you know how difficult that can be. For me, giving up wheat based foods was harder.

Let's see...pizza, spaghetti, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, mac-n-cheese, subs, dinner rolls, any bread really, fried chicken, calzones, etc., etc. Everything that had become the main staples of my diet and feel-good devices was gone. Okay, I am not making the claim that I will never eat pizza or pasta again, but it will be an occasional treat, eaten in moderation. But, I won't have any of it until I have completed my current weight loss challenge.


So, what does one do when they deprive themselves of their happiness crutches? For me, I have been replacing them with an actual foundation (body) of happiness. Finding the will power to make the change was the beginning and brought a level of tentative positivity. As the days ticked by that positivity was replaced by confidence. Progress added to confidence and ambition was kindled. And that's about where I am now. Having now lost fourteen pounds, as of this morning, and seeing the changes taking place  in my body I am able to contemplate where I want to go with this. What do I want to look like? What do I want to be able to do? I am no longer bemoaning that I can't jog but am developing new goals and benchmarks that are realistic and physically possible. I won't make any predictions or divulge any plans, its a surprise ( for all of us).

Aside from the happiness I am generating within myself from my physical advances I am replacing my old food pat-on-the backs with new healthy versions. Granted I am in the early stages of this and, like so many before me, I am still eating a rather Spartan version. I eat a lot of leafy green salads with baked chicken or other lean meat. I have my simple yogurt and banana breakfast and my fresh fruit snacks. I have yet to do the really important and sustaining step of relearning how to cook and create tasty healthy dishes with spices and natural ingredients. But, that is on the list and any suggestions are welcome.  The important thing here is that I am enjoying the food. I don't have the feeling that I am eating "rabbit food." I actually love salad, especially with a little blue cheese dressing.

Attitude has made all the difference and has been a wonderful flavor enhancer. No need for MSG, my endorphins are flowing from knowing that I am doing something good for myself. This may sound very lame but I am feeling great about feeling great (except for that stomach bug last weak, that sucked, or spewed, or something). This new outlook on food actually surprises me daily as I simply have no desire for my former food favs. I can only assume that my attitude change has taken root in my subconscious and I am totally committed to the mission. Why the hell else would I not eat a piece of tasty, yummy butter and honey coated toast? Beats me!

ARGHGHGH, TOOOAAAST

Post Script on feeling great:

Having the title themes from  Raider of the Lost Ark and Superman , by John Williams, playing as you type helps too.